Disciple: (n) a person who is a pupil or an adherent of the doctrine of another.
I. am. a. disciple. of. Christ.
Ministry- (n/v) an act or instance of serving
This past year, I have been involved in Cedarville’s discipleship ministry. My role as a discipleship group leader is to lead a weekly bible study, and attend another weekly bible study. Simple, right? Not worthy of a blog post, right?
In high school, I took my Bible study teachers for granted. Now that I look back, Aunt Anora and Aunt Danette had a huge role in my spiritual life. I can remember instances that I did not want to hear what they had to say, or that I disagreed and thought ‘they have no clue.’ However, they never stopped to care, or to think about what I thought about them. Instead, I can now see that they focused on their task to teach the group of girls the Word of God. This meant challenging us, building us up in Christ, and spending huge amounts of time in preparation and prayer. Bible study was not always hard or awful for me, though. I remember looking forward to Wednesday nights and the time that I would have to learn more about Christ and to be challenged and to pray and have communion with other believers. I can still remember so many of the things that I learned while studying prayer, James, and Becoming a Women of Excellence.
Having that amazing experience as my only background to Bible study, I found it very daunting to be in a position of spiritual leadership at the beginning of my sophomore year. It has also been an issue with my pride. Not everyone is selected to be a discipleship group leader, and having a position like that can certainly give me a big head. However, God has built me up and humbled me (only God could do that!) throughout my time as a discipleship group leader. Each week I spend a few hours in preparation and prayer, but no matter how prepared I am, it never goes like I expect it to go. Sometimes I do not want to have a bible study in my room. Sometimes I am so stressed with schoolwork that I want to hide and just do homework instead of studying the bible with seven other girls. And sometimes I ask a question…like, ‘what are you doing to serve this week?’…..and then it hits me…’what am I doing to serve this week???’. And you know what…it’s always the weeks that I think it’s going to go terrible because I clearly am not ready and because I clearly don’t have the answers to the questions and I clearly did not spend enough time preparing or praying and I did this and I did that. And then my girls come and we discuss. And they tell me after wards that they learned so much. And God goes, ‘see, it’s not really about you, is it? No, no, it’s ALL about me.’