It’ true, isn’t it?
God is so much more powerful than my current situation, so why isn’t he doing anything? I mean, why isn’t he fixing it the way I think he should be fixing it? I just want God to send me a carrier pigeon- just a brief message, a brief ANSWER. Just somebody give me an answer. Tell me what it is that is making me sick. If it’s too much to ask, can I also know how long it will last? I feel like if I know this is going to last another 8 months I will take next semester off. If it is only going to last another day, I will be ok with life as it is planned. It’s just too bad that my plans do not match up with His plans.
And that is what the Lord is teaching me right now. That my plans do not match his plans. That His plans really are greater than my plans. That he truly does have control of this situation despite everything that is happening. That even if it doesn’t end God is still good, God is still in control, God is still sovereign and His plan is still better than whatever I have planned for my life. It’s easy to say all that when things are going well, but at the end of 11 weeks, when my body is beyond brokenness, when my heart is also discouraged beyond pain, and when the questions exceed the answers, how easy is it to praise God? For me, it’s next to impossible. Really, it is.
And it is to people like me; broken, needy and losing all hope that most of the books of the New Testament were written. That is why I can read this and find comfort and hope”
“Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: REJOICE. Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable– if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things.”
I encourage you to read the rest of Phillipians 4. Pray that the Lord teaches me contentment in his well, not my own. Pray that I find peace, and answers.