I don’t even know where to start. It’s been about 3 weeks since I have posted on here. Not because I didn’t want to, trust me.
And I’m sorry, this post probably won’t have any pictures. =(
To be honest, a lot of people think that I have a perfect life. Well, maybe not a perfect life, but close to it. I am married to an incredible man at the age of 21. I achieve good grades in school, so a lot of people label me as a “model student”, I try to put myself together before I go out in public, so I appear decent, my home is usually neat when people come over, and to top it all off I want to be a missionary. What could be more perfect than that life? Please, please, please…if you have ever thought any of those things, erase them from your mind.
Theo and I have a wonderful marriage, but we are far from perfect. We have major problems in certain areas, and although we are working on them, we are not perfect. We did get married very young and therefore we still have a lot to learn. I think that the biggest thing I have had to battle throughout the brief 6 months of the marriage so far is loneliness. I bet every person who has been a newlywed just nodded their head and most people who are not married shook their head in disapproval at my ignorance and my lack of contentment at the situation that God has given me. Trust me, I am SO glad to be married and I do not regret the decision. But with marriage comes that commitment to one person. I feel that a lot of people around me now treat me as if I only need that one person to exist. For me, that is far from the truth. I still want to be pursued, both by my husband and by friends who have encouraged me through every walk of life. It is no different because I have a husband. I was just searching in the Word for some comfort for this loneliness, and my study bible said this under 1 Corinthians 7:
“Many people naively think that marriage will solve all their problems. Here are some problems marriage won’t solve: (1) loneliness, (2) sexual temptation, (3) satisfaction of one’s deepest emotional needs, (4) elimination of life’s difficulties. Marriage alone does not hold two people together, but commitment does– commitment to Christ and to each other despite conflicts and problems. As wonderful as it is, marriage does not automatically solve every problem. Whether married or single, we must be content with our situation and focus on Christ, not on loved ones to help address our problems.”
Wow. I couldn’t have said it better myself. Does anybody else feel this way about your marriage? I just want to know that I am not alone in this deep love that I have for my husband and our marriage, but the feelings of loneliness that creep in on a far too often basis.
I challenge you- and myself- to look out for those who are lonely. What a tool I have been given to minister to those who are suffering from loneliness due not to marriage or singleness, but to the fact that we are not putting our contentment and vision on Christ.
I guess that’s all for now,